Networking Unleashed Host Michael A. Forman

Welcome back to Networking Unleashed, Building

Profitable Connections. I'm your host, Michael

Forman, and today we're talking about the intersection

of behavior, leadership, and profitability. My

guest is a trusted voice when it comes to helping

business leaders make a powerful shift from managing

people to motivating performance. She dives into

how we show up, our tone, our energy. and our

consistency. This directly impacts the relationships

we build and results we drive. So whether you're

leading a team, running a business, or just trying

to navigate leadership without burning out, this

conversation will show you how powerful your

presence truly is. We're unpacking why the most

profitable leaders aren't always the loudest.

They're the ones who connect with purpose, lead

with clarity, and build trust that lasts. So

if you're ready to lead in a way to energize

your team, strengthen your network, and boost

your bottom line, let's dive in. I'd like to

welcome to the podcast today, Debbie Longo, which

I just found out she's a New York native. But

I would like you to introduce yourself, Debbie,

and tell us a little bit about your background.

Yeah, so thank you very much for having me on

the show. I appreciate it. And my name is Debbie

Longo. I'm an executive behavioral coach. I've

been in this business for over 25 years. I had

a spiritual teacher mentor until 2021 and she

passed away of cancer. So I decided to continue

her work and start a business and really get

into what is my gift that I was born with. That

is how I was very successful in this business.

So I worked with her, she helped me get clients,

then I got them on my own. I also have a graduate

degree in criminology, criminal justice, some

psychology background. So I decided, and it's

a little bit of a story with the pandemic, COVID.

the companies were going out of business and

they were going bankrupt and they said, oh, it

was because of COVID and the economy. And to

tell you the truth, the way that I teach it,

that's not why, that's not the reason. And if

I teach something or I work with a client and

let's say I complete the process, I complete

their goal, They get to their goal. I complete

everything that they want to do. All their needs

are met. Then for them, outside forces doesn't

matter. So they could be hit with anything, with

a recession, anything, and they will still be

successful. And the other companies will say,

what happened? We're not doing good. How are

you doing so good? And then they will know when

that happens. So it's a little bit of a different

way than most coaches do it the way that they

perform and they make their plan and everything.

So I take a very different take on it. And there's

a lot of back end stuff that I do also that really

helps the client. It really depends on what the

client is and what their needs are. But that's

very brief of my background. Wow, that's great.

It sounds very intuitive, but it sounds like

every business needs what you have, what you're

offering. So I can't wait to get into my questions.

You focus on how behavior impacts profitability.

How does that show up in the way leaders connect

and build relationships internally and externally?

That really is going to depend on what the relationship

is and how it's formed. There is a line between

a boss and an employee, but a boss A lot of times

is very ego oriented and they give orders and

they need to follow what the job duties are,

what their role is, what the employee's role

is. So they need to be a little bit more of an

authority figure. Like it could be even like

a mentor or something. But the thing with that

is if they build too much of something, either

too much ego, too much negativity, too much of

giving orders, dominance, then that relationship

will almost always fail. So I want to do it as

a business owner, as a boss. I want to be able

to do all of those things in a positive way because

that's my job. is to enforce what their job duties

are, to make sure everybody is doing the right

thing, to make sure that they're doing everything

that the company asks for, because that is the

way that the company operates. There's no other.

You can't just employee can't just make their

own job duties or what they want to say and do

every day that they go to work. So that's really

a boss's job. So if I take it as. A positive

way, if I approach what the employee needs to

do, just as an example, they go to work every

day. I need to tell them maybe their job duties

are different every day. They might not be the

same. Something might come up and they might

need to do something different. So I need to

tell them, but I need to talk and express these

things. in a positive way not in an authority

way where it's very negative kind of like a military

ash kind of thing that's not being a positive

influence now it could be. If i'm not doing it

over over overreacting something like that that's

the thing because when a boss does too much of

it. Or they say. This has to be the way, right?

Where there's like a demands kind of thing, then

that's not going to turn into a positive way.

Then the employee is going to get upset and the

employees probably not going to say anything.

And then they're going to start to get resentments.

And then you have a whole ball of wax now is

starting to build, right? That snowball is small

and then it gets bigger and bigger. What I'm

hearing, you're really taking the boss. management

style and creating a leadership role with that

boss because one of my talks I tell the difference

between boss and leader and what's the difference

and really you don't as a business owner I really

don't want any bosses under me I only want leaders

because a leader will show others how to lead

not just boss them around. So it's very good

information that you just shared with us. Leadership

burnout is real. How can building a strong, trusted

network serve as both prevention and support

during those seasons? Here's my question. How

many leaders, if there is a CEO or an owner of

a company, how many leaders do you have under

you? Are you just saying, oh, I just want to

hire one assistant manager and just to save money

because I just want to save money. That's just

the way that it is. I don't. The company doesn't

need to. Let's say the company is doing good.

So they're going to hire one assistant manager

and the boss is not going to care. And then it's

going to start to get busy because this season's.

It probably in every single job, there are times

that might not be seasons as far as what we consider.

But in every job, every company, there's highs

and lows, there's peak times. So the manager,

the CEO might not care. And he's going to work

and work. And then what's going to happen is

going to get busier. And then he's gonna work

more hours and then there's gonna be a big problem

when that happens because he's really gonna pounds

on his employees gonna take it out he's gonna

be working a lot of extra hours i'm not talking

five hours a week i'm talking a lot and he's

really gonna be pounding his employees even to

the point where he's abusing them and i've seen

this happen. It might not be that he's really

what we think is abuse, but maybe being yelling

or raising his voice. So how many people, if

you're listening to this and you're a CEO or

a manager, how many people do you have under

you? Are you sure that you have enough people

where you, even if it gets busy, you don't have

to work 60 or 70 hours a week all the time? So

instead of having one assistant manager when

it's not busy, you don't do this when it's busy.

You don't do this during the peak time, you do

it non -peak time. You have one assistant manager,

non -peak time, hire another one. See if you're

working 40 hours, if you're working more, then

hire another one. Because I'm going to say this,

the more people you hire, the more inviting it

is for a customer to come in. If there's two

people working, And I've been to stores over

here where I didn't want to go in because I knew

that I had to wait because I know there's two

people working all the time. It's ridiculous.

And so if you have even if it's not busy, if

you have three people working, they'll know the

employees will know if they're managers or assistant

managers. That's inviting more customers to come

in or you're going to get more clients calling.

It doesn't matter what business it is. We're

not talking about the type of business. And we're

talking about how to run a company. So then it's

going to be inviting and then you're going to

get a lot of business. So that's really a different

take on it. You're talking about the downtime

and wouldn't that be a great time for training,

for extra training for the assistant managers

and for the people, whether it's a salesperson

or not. the customer service level has to be

that much higher than everybody else. So because

I've learned, I've had multiple businesses and

I've learned that if my employees are not happy,

they can't show their happiness to my customers.

So you always have to make sure you're, everybody

says the customer is always right. That's hogwash

because the employee, if they're happy, they

will get to the bottom of whatever problem my

customer has and fix it. And the customer will

always be happy, the employee will be happier,

then my managers will be happier, and it goes

on that way. So that's very good. What's one

behavioral pattern in leaders that unintentionally

blocks profitable connection with their teams

or peers. I think that the podcast before you,

I spoke about negativity, respect in the workplace,

and I think that there are several things. So

if I combine all these specific things, I am

creating all these specific things of negativity

that I do. Right. We just spoke about ego. authority

over over authority, right? When I create those

things, no matter what it is, I am creating a

recipe for disaster, literally. So it's not going

to happen immediately. It's going to happen gradually.

And then people say, oh, I don't know what happened.

Happened right away. It just happened. The CEO

says 20 people quit. Like overnight but just

happened just like that now that's not the way

it happens it happens gradually it's just that

the ceo the boss doesn't see those warning signs

and there are a lot. There are a lot of warning

signs not just a few and then most of the time

staring me right in the face. So i want to get

down to what is specifically going on in that

business in that company and i want to make sure

that i could find ways solutions to get rid of

all of this whatever is going on all of this

negativity they're doing this is all natural

stuff that forces do. This is not their fault.

This is not something that they say, I'm going

to go and abuse my employees today. They don't

do that. It's just the way that a lot of times

it's just human behavior, just natural human

behavior, but people don't know how to control

it. That's true. They have to, the managers have

to set a few things in place first, whether it

is how the employees can talk to you, have an

open door, but you need to have a survey or something.

More importantly than what's going well, what's

not going well? What would you see as a change?

And what would you suggest for those changes?

So all of that gives the employees that much

more feeling of something, I like this job and

oh, he took my idea and he ran with it. So it

gives them a little sense of purpose as well.

So you're right. There are a lot of warning signs,

but there's a lot of ways that you can combat

that and have them take care of it. You talk

about shifting from managing people to motivating

performance. How does that shift affect the way

we network inside of our organizations? So again,

there are a lot of things here, and not only

do we invite the customer, because of the way

that we set up our company, our corporation.

But we always want to be fair to the employees

because the client or the customer knows how

they treat their employees. They can see it and

they probably can see it immediately. So there

are things that we want we can do. We can do

all that are positive. We can make goals. We

can get rid of that extreme authority figure,

that negativity, the attitude where I'm the boss,

you have to listen to me, and that's all there

is to it. And when we get rid of these attitudes

and behaviors, then everything falls into place.

Everybody's happy. The employees are happy. The

clients are happy and people want to do business

with companies like that. Now there are companies

that say that have a therapist like a number

you could call and then you could call the therapist

and the therapist says, oh, we won't tell the

company anything. It's just between you and me.

And that may be true. And that's fine. But why

can't the boss act that way? Why do they have

to get a therapist involved? Does the boss know

what they're really doing? Do they know that

they could possibly be contributing to the fact

that this employee needs to call this phone number?

This employee needs to call this person that's

an outside force. And there's nothing wrong with

that. There really isn't. But does it come? from

the manager? Is it because of the CEO that this

employee is has to reach out to this therapist

or counselor? The answer might be yes, the answer

might be no, but this is something that a business

owner should really think about because we don't

want to throw it on somebody else or we don't

know if the employee is happy or not. And all

of these things are going to help to build a

very successful company. You want to talk about

increasing sales and profits? It'll be over the

top. The CEO will not believe it. It's going

to the moon. Absolutely. Again, that goes back

to my I have a happy employee that can talk to

the person, your supervisor, whomever can just

walk in and say, look, I've got a problem or.

What do you think about this? I had that open

door policy with my employees. I said, look,

I don't mind you bringing me things that are

wrong, but don't come to me with something that's

wrong without an idea of how to fix it. So put

a little onus on them as well. In your experience,

what's the difference between a leader who builds

loyal teams and one who just gets compliance?

How does communication style factor in? Kind

of what I just spoke about. My question is this.

I think the business owner or the CEO should

really think about, are they just going to work

for the money? Are they only concerned with the

fact that they want to increase their profits?

I'm not talking about for the company. I'm talking

about for them, for their board, for them to

keep the company. a float for them, let's say

if they're on the stock market, so they could

keep raising the stock market. Are they only

concerned with money? However you want to phrase

it, there's a million ways to phrase that. Or

are they more apt to think about if the employees

are happy? When they go to work every day, Do

they think immediately, as soon as they get to

work, do they think, how am I going to make my

money today for myself? How am I going to increase

my paycheck? How am I going to make the board

members happy? Or do they think, which employee

do I need to help today? Which employee was a

little upset yesterday when I left? And maybe

something happened, or maybe I was unsure. I

didn't want to say anything. I had to go home

and think about it. What can I do today to make

my employees happier than they were the day before?

Now, which way do I want to go? Which one does

the CEO think that they are going to be more

successful? Which direction do they want to live

on greed and power? It's one kind of works with

the other. If you want to see why your employee

is unhappy and you can make them happy, wouldn't

that in turn make them a better employee, better

with your customers, and give you a boost in

your paycheck? So you're handling both by handling

the one thing. So instead of just looking at

the whole picture saying, how can I make more

money? You can just see how your employees are

doing, help them through their problems, that

in itself. will build your profits. That's right.

What role does emotional intelligence play in

building profitable building relationships, especially

at the leadership level? So let's think about

what emotional intelligence would be. Would that

be like, I got a high GPA when I graduated? I

don't think that's what it is. You can look it

up. If you're watching this podcast, you can

look up the definition online. There's a lot

of definitions will come up and you could look

up which one appeals to you or refers to you

the best. But my definition is two things that

we just spoke about over exaggeration, where

I am overly enforcing things, overly authority,

almost like authoritarian. and the negativity,

the employees don't appreciate me. And when these

things happen, and rewind this podcast, if you're

a CEO or business owner, rewind it, just to some

parts. You don't have to listen to the whole

thing again, just to go back and forth with some

of these parts. When that happens, my emotions

get to be extreme. So they'll go up a little

and a little, right, gradually. And then they

get to be over the top where it's too much. And

not only do I become more negative, I might start

to say the employees, I might put the way that

I am, my attitudes and behaviors on the employee.

And because I'm a certain way, I would say the

employee is this way to me. If I'm loud. The

employee is being loud to me. The reason why

the employee is loud to you is because you're

allowed first to the employee. And this is why

we look at ourselves, because what I do triggers

the other person to do the same thing. Absolutely.

You could watch any show. You could watch the

news. It's everywhere. You could watch it. If

you look for it, it's everywhere. And you're

really only Get what you give so if you're giving

that calm and Consensual and it's an overall

feeling of calmness and let's talk about this

respectfully Yes, you have to watch out what

you say because it might stoke something in that

other person But if you remain calm if you remain

above the whole conversation Then they will respond

exactly the same way, and you'll get more out

of it. You'll get much more out of it. For leaders

navigating constant change, how can they maintain

trust and credibility in their relationships

while still pushing for results? One of the big

things that I talk about, and I made two podcasts

on this already, is respect. They can respect

their employees. They could treat their employees

like a human being. People are not robots. people

do not come to work and expect that they are

going to do the same thing over and over again.

And they're not going to say anything. And the

manager or the CEO is going to do whatever they

want. They're going to treat the employee however

they want. And the employee is going to be fine.

That's not going to happen. That's not realistic.

And I'm going to explain to you a trick. Tons

of companies do this. Retail and big companies

also do this. What they do is they rotate the

job duties. So every time, almost every time

the employee comes to work, the manager will

say, I have this job for you today. So then they

say every day they'll have a different job for

them or they'll have different forms to work

on. It's not the same exact thing. It's not like

a robotic way. It's not the same exact job over

and over. And when they do that, that not only

helps the employee because the employee is doing

something different every day, then they think

that it's a different job or they could be happier

because they're not doing the same thing every

day. So this just creates all of a positive feedback.

and positive attitude will give the employee

a positive attitude. And this is very easy to

train an employee. It's not that difficult. You

could even train on something and then you could

say, let's show you this and let's show you this

and just add a few things onto the training.

Because if it's a big company, each job duty

might take a lot of training. Even if they there's

a lot of rules, there's a lot of regulations

is like tons that they have to follow, like on

every position. But they could just add that

to the training. There are things they could

do rather than just saying, no, I can't do that.

Won't it also allow the employee to see what

the other employees do and maybe have a little

more respect for that position? Because let's.

just use a retail position, the front person

against the warehouse person. And the front person

will say, oh, the warehouse people, they don't

know what they're doing. They're always screwing

this up. But if you take them out of it and put

them into the warehouse, say, oh, OK, so this

is why this happens or this happens. So maybe.

I have a better idea of what goes on and maybe

it could be done this way. And that person can

go up to their supervisor and say, look, I was

in the warehouse and they did things this way.

Would it be better if we did it this way? So

it was she's bringing or he's bringing the idea

forward. They may say, no, we tried that, but

it didn't work or something else like that. But

it gives them a feeling of something they listen.

to what I have to say. OK, so before I ask you

the last question, I always ask us of all the

podcast guests, you are successful. You've been

doing this for 20 years. What major mistake did

you make and how did you come out of it? I started

a little too late when I used my spiritual teacher

as a mentor, obviously, but a person that is

just going to give me the business. And if I

started this business a lot sooner, I wouldn't

have been faced with a decision. Should I start

the business or not? Right after she passed away,

because I didn't know that she was going to die.

We don't know that somebody is going to die.

And she was not there wasn't anything wrong with

her up until the last year that last maybe two

years. And she was living because she got the

cancer pretty. fast and then she just wanted

to die. So I didn't predict that was going to

happen. But I was able more than able for me

to start my own business while she was alive.

And I would have been this would have already

been established, way established more than what

it is now. I don't look into the past and I know

that this just happened in the right. It happened

in this time for a reason. I don't dwell on the

fact that I'm not successful now. It's difficult

for me to get successful now because I didn't

do it when I thought that I should do it. My

mother would always say everything happens for

a reason. Everything does. And it works out in

your time. So what you say is exactly along the

lines of what I've always believed. Now, bring

in this podcast full circle. If someone wants

to become more connected, more profitable leader,

what's the one behavior shift that they can start

practicing today? They can take a piece of paper,

go to work, and write down everything that they

see that's negative during their work day. Just

go about your normal day. Don't do anything different.

Write down things that... you see maybe if the

employee is unhappy or if a board member is a

little upset because they didn't make profits.

They didn't make their goal last week or last

month. Just write down everything that you see

that you don't like or you think it's an issue

or something that you think you should work on.

And I'm going to say, be honest. Don't say there's

a problem here. but it's not a big deal. Listen

to what your first thought is, and listen to

what you are thinking immediately, and don't

make any excuses. Go home, take that piece of

paper, or you could do it at the end of the day.

I would do it while the, you could do it on your

phone. You could do it anywhere, it's very easy.

You don't have to, I say paper and pen, because

that's what we used to do. Go home, read that

paper. and say to myself, do I need a coach?

I see there's a few things wrong here. Do I need

somebody to help me to get rid of these things,

these issues, these problems? The employees are

unhappy. My peers, the board members, they telling

me they're coming to me with all these issues.

Don't point the finger and say that person is

a problem. No, look at everything and think about,

do I need a coach? Can I help to do something

to improve my company? And that's really the

bottom line. And that's a simple thing that anybody,

the janitor could do it. An employee could even

do it and they could give it to their boss. Everybody

watches everybody when everybody watches everybody

and. Debbie, I'll tell you that's a perfect segue

for me to ask you if somebody wanted to get hold

of you either to be coached or just to find out

anything that we spoke about. What's the best

way that they get hold of you? Life in Bloom

and why dot net. That is my website and they

can get all of the information off of there.

I have a podcast page on there. They can also

go to YouTube. And look up, I have two podcasts,

they can Google my name, you know, in the search

on YouTube, they can put in my name. And I have

Behavioral Profit and Six Figure Shift Show.

So I have two podcasts. So they can look that

up, they can reach me through YouTube, Facebook

and Instagram. And like I said, they could just

put my name in the search, it'll come up right

away. So there's a lot of ways to get in touch

with me. And we can start off slow. doesn't have

to be a big thing, a big problem. I can't solve

this. It's over the top. I don't know what to

do. It doesn't have to get to that. It can be

just a little thing. I need help with this and

that's it. And that's perfectly fine because

the client tells me what to do. I don't tell

the client what to do. I give the client solutions

as they tell me. What their issue is or what

they need help with i give the client solutions

but it's up to them ultimately to carry out.

Everything that i explain to them everything

that i teach them the way that i do it. I have

to tell you, this was a great podcast. Thank

you for all of your insights into business itself.

And if anybody's listening wants to get hold

of Debbie, please just contact her through the

website, through anything, and have her help

you. So Debbie, thank you very much for coming

on. Thank you for having me on the show. I appreciate

it. Well, hold on, folks. Don't go anywhere.

Let's hear from our sponsors. David Neal, co

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They provide prevention training programs for

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to revvedupkids .org. Henry Kaplan, Century 21.

When it comes to making the biggest financial

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A huge thank you to our guests for sharing such

incredible insights today. And of course, a big

shout out to you, our amazing listeners, for

tuning in and spending your time with us. If

you're interested in my digital courses, being

coached, or having me come and talk to your company,

just go to Michael and fill out the request form.

Remember, networking isn't about being perfect.

It's about being present. So take what you've

learned today, get out there, and make some meaningful

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