Transforming Leadership Before Crisis Becomes Collapse — with Meike Bettscheider

Welcome to The Behavioral Profit, the podcast

where leadership behavior meets bottom line results.

I'm your host, Debbie Longo, executive behavioral

coach. Each week, we unpack the mindsets, habits

and cultural shifts that turn teams into high

performance, profit driving powerhouses. So you

can lead your purpose and win with people. Mikey

is a global leadership, transformation strategist,

and founder of Compass Setting. She works at

the intersection of behavioral science, emotional

intelligence, and intuitive insight to guide

leaders through high stakes transitions before

crisis becomes collapse. With an executive MBA

from Chicago Booth, and executive master. in

change from instead and two decades of international

leadership experience. Mikey brings a new combination

of boardroom credibility and deep human insight.

She's held executive roles across Europe, the

Middle East and Africa and now designs bespoke

transformation retreats in Greece for startups,

foundations and organizations from the US, Canada

and UK. Let me start again. Her signature model

includes 24 seven leadership, cloaching, epigemic

insight and face reading, a powerful tool she

uses to reveal blind spots and untapped potential

as single conversation. Clients call Mikey when

the pressure is on, when identity, business and

vision feel misaligned and stay because her approach

doesn't just create clarity, it creates change

that sticks. Good afternoon, Mikey. Welcome to

the show. Thank you so much, Debbie, for having

me and for your kind introduction. So there's

a few questions here. Segment one, understanding

the leader beneath the role. You use the phrase

behaviors beneath the behavior. Can you explain

what that means and why it matters in leadership?

Absolutely. It's actually one of the most important

things I bring into my work because leaders often

look at what they're doing. overworking, micromanaging,

avoiding tough conversations, and they try to

fix the behavior. I'm sure you've seen that too

in your work. But what really shifts things is

understanding what's underneath. Often, from

my experience, there's a fear of not being enough.

That's actually a belief that rest equals weakness

and a driver for perfection that's rooted in

often childhood survival. And I've had leaders

come to me saying, I just need to delegate better.

And actually, we end up uncovering a lifelong

fear of disappointing others. And once they see

it, it's like the whole system softens. And that's

where we can do the real work. Thank you. That

was good. That's exactly what I do. Exactly what

I teach and That's the most important thing to

me is to really get down to their behavior and

what is participating in what they're doing now,

whether it's negative or positive, but if you're

positive and everything is working great, then

you basically don't need me to say it, but that's

what we're trying to do here. So that was important.

That was good. Thank you. How can face reading

uncover leadership blind spots before a conversation

even starts? That's a great question because

face reading is not about mimics or gestures.

It's really where it gets fun because the face

never lies. We store so much information in our

facial structure and features we were born with.

I've had moments in sessions where I notice an

asymmetry or tension line, just a line that points

to suppressed emotions. And when I reflect that

back, the client goes quiet and says, no one's

ever seen that before. Because face reading,

let me see where potential is hiding. because

it's focused on qualities, never judgmental,

or where emotional energy is leaking before the

client even says a word that makes it easier.

We don't have to go back to the past and whatever

happened before. And for example, I once worked

with a leader who had a very soft filtrum, that's

this area here above the mouth and the sensitive

jawline, huge emotional intelligence, but totally

shut off. And when I named that, he actually

admitted he'd been ignoring his empathy because

it got in the way of hard decisions. But that

was exactly the trait his team, in that case,

needed more of. And when we talked through it

and about it, and I showed it to him, it opened

the door to transformation and that very quickly.

Yeah, that was good, too. Can you share a powerful

moment when this revealed something crucial?

Yes, absolutely. So because of what I said earlier,

the leader really was hiding things. He was not

living his authentic self and his quality. And

a leader doesn't have to be harsh or hard or

dominant or stringent. But if we are leading

like we are, more maybe with empathy or with

the willpower we have or the courage or the structure,

then the team sees it and then this team follows

actually. And that's especially in crisis or

in crucial moments. I think it's interesting.

The face reading, there's all kinds of readings

and All different ways that we can detect maybe

somebody's personality or what they're saying

what they're thinking what they're gonna say

so there's all different ways that we could do

that with the body and there's like face reading.

And there's all different other things we could

do yes so so the point is that the deeper i found

from. My clients and also myself personally,

this is actually part of my story The deeper

that I look into myself And the deeper that I

search within myself my soul my body That will

help me to reveal Certain things and we're not

not necessarily about the past if it needs to

go into the past. That's fine But I'm talking

about now I'm talking about right this second

the deeper that I do that the more things that

I reveal and I see about myself the Better it

is for me to realize right that I have to change

and if I go and I want to change, then the results

are out of this world. Phenomenal. I absolutely

agree. And it's always the start is always to

go inward and not looking outward and really

facing ourselves, being super honest to ourselves.

And as you said. Feeling it in our body or questioning

our beliefs, our mind. It's the whole system

we have to look at. And it tells us so many things.

Yeah. And unfortunately, there's a saying that

everybody must hit bottom. So a lot of times.

Very very receptive if my business is about to

go bankrupt or if I'm failing in my relationships

all different relationships and whether it's

business or personal because this carries over

if it's business it'll carry over to my personal

life and vice versa. So do I want to wait until

that really happens do I want to wait until I

have no money at all. and my business is totally

bankrupt and I can't even put food on my table

for my family. Do I want to wait until then?

Well, that's completely up to the person. That's

up to the individual whether they want to or

not. But the bottom line is that I want to help

people to change and grow and however we do it

before it gets to that point. And then they could

really make it just in. Go to an unbelievable

level. 100 % agree. It's always, but it's a two

way street. They have to be open and willing

to be, let's say curious about some methods,

about some help, about looking at themselves.

So the tools that shift the inner compass, you

integrate tools like face reading and empathetic.

coaching and the work. How do these work together

to help someone grow through a leadership challenge?

Yeah, it's a mix. It's my personal mix. And as

you said before, everyone, we all coaches, we

have our own kind of mix and methods. It totally

depends to the individual we are talking to or

working with, because I don't believe in one

size fits all coaching. My clients are human

systems like yours. So I use tools that speak,

as we said before, to the mind, body, and beliefs.

And we all usually have a lot of wrong beliefs.

Face reading shows us physical and behavioral

traits, as I said before, qualities. Epigenetics

helps us understand especially how stress and

trauma affect gene expressions, which is very

individual, and how we can shift them through

environment change or micro change habits. And

the work Byron Katie, that's for the mind, the

stories we tell ourselves, the anxieties we build,

the beliefs we keep us or they keep us trapped.

And when a client is stuck, I actually look at

all three layers and what's visible in their

body, what's stored in their biology and what

they're telling themselves that might actually

no longer be true. This is how I mix it all together

and try to support them very quickly. Like we

were saying before, there's all different ways

to quote unquote read somebody right in a million

different ways. So if I want to do something,

it's like if I want the psychology reason about

why I'm doing something, I go to a psychologist.

If I want the medical reason, I go to a medical

doctor. It depends on what type of reason that

I want to get. But I don't know what this is.

Personally, I do. But if I am a business owner

or an executive, I don't really know what it

is. So this is one of the reasons why I have

these podcasts. Also, just to open the person's

mind and then the person might say, I don't really

know about this, but it does sound interesting.

So maybe it's something that I would like to

explore. That is so valuable. What you're doing,

because as you said, there's so many things.

There are so many things out there, but it has

to speak to every individual. And you're offering

that to all the people. That's amazing. Thank

you. Tell us more about the concept. of proselience.

How does it differ from traditional resilience?

I think everyone is talking about resilience

a lot, and this is about bouncing back. And proselience

is actually about shifting forward. It's a term

I use to describe the proactive inner growth

that happens through adversity. and not just

after it so when i work with clients it means

not just helping leaders cope but helping them

evolve so that they can face future challenges

way easier because you didn't come here to be

good at surviving you come here to live lead

and actually a line from a deeper place and when

someone learns to lead with prozilians, they

definitely stop repeating old reactions and start

leading from clarity, even in chaos. And I believe

it's really one of the biggest shifts we can

do. And I help them through, especially through

my 24 -7 coaching container. Because i believe

if we if we get aware become aware of the wrong

beliefs and we become prosilliant and we know

okay what we can do for the future. That doesn't

work overnight and i'm sure you have the same

experience with your clients so. The behavior

change takes time it's a process and this is

why i offer for my own experience actually that

crisis doesn't happen once a week. During the

coaching session, it happens on Friday night,

Saturday morning, Sunday, lunchtime, whatever.

And then they need some not sure there's somebody

there or a reminder. Hey, you can do it differently.

Yeah. And that's a really good point. And this

is why we do this. Like you said, what's an example

of a micro shift that leads to macro long term

change? Actually, there is so many. different

ones but when I go back to one leader who lost

it all and I was working with him he lost confidence

he lost the job several times and so we worked

first on the qualities through the face reading

we worked on the resources he had I could see

in the face I reminded him of that we worked

on the wrong beliefs and He really raised up

and said okay that was anyway not my career path

i was happy with so we got away from the victim

it's horrible i will never. The confidence trade

and changed into. really something new, and he's

now having his own consultancy business, which

fits way better to his qualities. He's playing

in a band because he found back or rethought

about his remembered his musicality as a resource

for stress relief. And so that that was actually

a big shift through only a couple of sessions.

Yeah, that's good, because like we said, it's

looking within yourself. And if I try that, And

then I see the result. It's like working on acting

on blind faith. And I see the result, which we

know is going to be positive, but the person

doesn't know that. Then I can see that it's really

going to work. And then I want to do more and

more of it. So to me, that's just the way I do

it with my clients and the outcomes that we get

from that. Yes. So leadership through pressure

versus presence, you've worked with high pressure

leaders who unknowingly create fear. What kinds

of behaviors tend to send these signals and how

can they be shifted? That's a great question

as well, because I see this all the time, especially

with very driven, smart, well -meaning leaders.

They don't set out to scare people. but their

urgency, tone, and also the body language signals

for sure danger. It's things like walking into

a room and diving into numbers without eye contact,

sending a 3am slack, repeating a we must win

mindset without checking actually if the team

is already burning out, and often they say But

I'm being transparent. And they are. But transparency

without emotional attunement creates panic and

not trust within the teams from my experience.

And again, that's exactly why I created that

24 -7 model so I can help them in real time and

not a week later while the team is already demotivated

and the coaching For sure, you do the same isn't

about giving them more to do. It's about helping

them actually see the ripple effect of their

presence and learning how to shift energy as

fast as they shift strategy. Yeah. So in thank

you for that. In my experience, a lot of times

fear has to do with controlling where they're

not creating fear purposely. It's just that They're

very aggressive. They try to control the workplace,

let's say the manager or the business owner or

the executive. And then what happens is people

think that they always should do good and they

never should do anything out of sync or never

mess up on anything. And that's never going to

happen because people are human and they're not

going to do everything perfectly. So then they

might think that, well, I can't do it this way.

I can't be perfect all the time. And therefore,

I need to really try to be that way, even though

they know that they can't. And then that creates

fear because they don't want to get fired or

they don't want to get written up. So that's

really what my thing is for that. And the more

that I can look into that. And also, am I abusing

fear? Am I doing too much of it? So that's another

thing. What's the cost of mistaking pressure

for productivity in today's leadership culture?

And I think that comes back to what you said

before, creating anxiety. So that creates pressure

too, not only the number and the costs from my

perspective, it's enormous. Because when pressure

is constant, creativity dies, people stop offering

ideas because they don't feel safe enough, actually,

to risk imperfection. The problem is our culture

nowadays celebrates urgency. And we've confused

speed with success. But when I bring a team or

a founder to one of my retreats in Greece, so

totally out of their place in their environment

where they run and have that productivity and

speed and what becomes obvious is the best decisions

and the biggest clarity, the real innovation.

It definitely doesn't happen under pressure.

It happens in space, in reflection, in presence,

because we don't get better by running faster,

we get better actually by returning to a place

inside us that can listen. And that's what I

help leaders to access. And I'm sure you do the

same creating that space. I think that's really

crucial to really work and create something new.

What do you think? Yeah, so I agree. I like what

you said that it decreases the morale. So the

fear and the pressure and everything is a lot

of times that's just what if I'm a business owner

executive, I create a lot of that. Then people

that's what they're going to be. That's what

the employees are going to be receptive to. And

not only is that going to create more of that.

Fear and pressure, right? Then people get demotivated,

their morale gets low. They're not going to want

to make their goals. And then it's a whole cycle

going downward. So you're going down the ladder

instead of going up the ladder. And then what

happens then is that there's no, they're not

making their goals. And the company is literally

financially going backwards. And again, do they

want to wait to get to that point to realize

what are they doing? Or if they want to say that,

they might just want to point the finger and

just say, it's because of the employees, the

employees did this and that. But the role model

is the executive or business owner. And that's

really the bottom line. And that's what the employees

are going to follow. What people don't realize

is the employees are paying attention. Oh, yeah.

They're not like like an outer space. They pay

attention while they're working. They pay attention.

They look at everything everybody is doing, especially

the business owners and the executives, because

they're the ones that are creating all of these

things or they want to become a role model or

whatever the situation. And they enforcing their

position and everything that the employee needs

to do for the company, are they enforcing that

in a positive way or in a negative way? That's

the whole thing. And these are all negative things,

right, that we're talking about because we're

trying to fix these things or help the business

owner or whatever. So this is the thing. So there's

all different ways of looking at this. So that

was good. Next section, results alignment and

new compass. What does internalizing your compass

look like in action for a leader? Thank you for

asking, Debbie. I think it's a weird maybe concept,

internalizing the compass, but it means we stop

needing external validation for every move. Whenever

I work with leaders who've built massive success,

but at some point they lose touch with actually

why they're doing it or how they're showing up.

internalizing your compass means learning how

to choose from values and not fear. It's having

a grounded yes and a powerful no. That's the

core of my work and yeah, so I think it's important

to always reconnect also to our values as a leader.

So am I aligned to that? Is my compass aligned?

And values are a very powerful tool and easy

tool to check on your own compass. Where do I

get the values from? Maybe I get them from home.

I get them from my childhood. Maybe when I am

in high school, peer pressure. Maybe if I'm dating.

And that carries over because I'm not working

then. I don't have a full -time job then. So

a lot of that is going to carry over, but I'm

not a therapist and I don't do anything at all

that's related to therapy. And I'm not about

to, like we said, look into somebody's past and

try to bring stuff up and all these different

things. But the point that I'm trying to make

is that maybe the listener can actually think

about this just for themselves because they know.

what they're feeling, what they're thinking,

what happened in their past, whatever, from stuff

they can remember I'm talking about. They know

and maybe they want to think about it and maybe

they might see, well, there's a connection here.

I didn't realize that I did this in high school

or something happened. Maybe I had a traumatic

experience. when I was younger or something.

And I didn't realize this behavior now is carrying

to my job. And I never thought about that until

I listened to this podcast. And then I started

looking up or maybe I did a little bit and I

couldn't make the connection right now. I'm started

looking up on Google. Google is the psychologist

there, the medical doctor, everything. So so

that's what I might do or look at some videos

on YouTube. And that'll help. That'll help for

a while. But really, I need a coach and I'm not

here to sell anything to anybody. I'm here to

send the message and and teach people and explain

about all these different aspects of businesses,

of industries and all different ways that coaches

can help people. That's really what I'm here

to do. And it's up to the person, the listener.

the individual to decide if they really want

to do this. And if they don't decide it, then

I can help them. I have no problems with that.

I've done it hundreds of times. Yeah, I like

that. Yeah, absolutely. So that was good. Thank

you. So how do emotionally safer teams directly

translate into better performance and profitability?

I think that comes back to the point I made earlier

if they feel safe. that creates, or it's a milieu

where innovation can grow, where they feel heard,

seen. They can also bring in their own strengths

and skills, and then they work as a team. So

I think safety, it's proven. The most successful

companies or teams have the feeling of safety

within. And one part of safety is for sure the

biggest part, emotional. Safety that's very true

because when people think of safety they think

the floor is wet. And we should put a sign up

saying wet floor otherwise somebody is gonna

fall in the situation is not gonna be good. Maybe

we should close the back door because a bug or

something might come in or whatever. So these

are the things that I think of. So there's a

difference between that and emotional safety,

which I think is really important. That's actually

something I never thought about. I never considered

that that term. So last segment, practical tools

plus the reset moment. Can you walk us through

your reset moment practice and why such a small

pause can change the course of a day or decision?

Yes, sure. And this is. something I built into

every retreat I'm doing and every coaching, especially

with clients in fast -paced, high -pressure roles

we talked about earlier. A reset moment is exactly

that, a moment. Not an hour, not a ritual, just

a conscious pause. I ask leaders to stop, breathe,

and check. What state am I in right now? Is this

pressure I'm feeling mine? Am I leading or am

I reacting? And that might sound very basic,

but that little check -in when it becomes habitual

shifts the entire tone of leadership. It's how

a client goes from sending a reactive email to

picking up the phone for a real conversation

from repeating an old pattern to choosing something

more intentional, the small moment. But that

has a big ripple effect, especially in organizations

where people are mirroring each other constantly.

It's a good thing. It's not control. It's mirroring.

It's the safe environment where you can do that.

We talked about emotionally safe environment.

So that was good. So I do something very similar.

Breathing exercise or breathing meditation where

you're just breathing and you breathe in through

your stomach, through your solar plexus. And

then you wait two seconds and then in through

your nose and then out through your mouth. So

you're going. And you do that. And that could

be a reset also, which is very similar to what

you said. And you would do that several times.

And I know from my personal experience and people

that I work with, just breathing alone will change

your life. Yeah, that's fantastic. Absolutely.

Yeah, because it brings me to another level of

consciousness. And not only that, it. right away,

immediately stops whatever that negative thought

is or whatever it is that I'm doing, you know,

that's negative, you know, like fear and control.

So that's very that's anybody can do that. I

mean, that's you don't need training for that.

But it's a matter of self -discipline. To me,

that's really what it is. I don't want to stay

in those bad habits. Yeah. Yeah. And to do it

conscious. Next question, what's one powerful

question every leader should ask themselves in

high -stake moments? That's a great question,

Debbie. From my perspective, I think the question

would be, am I acting from alignment or from

anxiety? This one cuts straight through from

my perspective because... Often we justify urgency,

pressure, control. We talked about it earlier.

But when we pause and ask this, we see it clearly.

And if the answer is anxiety, it's not a moment

to perform for sure. It's a moment to reset or

breathe, as you just explained. And then one

question has helped myself and some of my clients

avoid major missteps. toxic communication loops,

or just simply exhausting themselves unnecessarily.

Yeah, very good. And this is everything that

we just talked about. And I gave some suggestions

also. These are things that they can do, ask

themselves a question, do a little exercise.

But the bottom line is, if I really want results.

And I want superior results. I'm talking about

something that you could never ever dream that

would even be possible in your lifetime. That

person needs a coach 100 percent. And I can do

that. I don't know if that's what you do, but

that's really a lot almost all the time. This

is not a question. This is not a theory. This

is not something that. I woke up yesterday and

I'm just starting doing podcasts and just start

talking. This is what I'm saying is coming from

25 years experience doing all different coaching,

life coaching, executive coaching with all different

people and industries. I basically put that all

together and turn that into a podcast. That's

basically what I did. Because each thing each

podcast I have number one is from people from

different industries but I put my two cents in

and and and I respond to the questions and and

the comments of the podcast and I'm putting all

of that all of those comments and everything

all From comes from my experience. So I think

that's interesting. That's something that I just

realized Really valuable, you know, right. I

don't need to share that with all of us. If someone

listening feels like they're stuck in urgency

or burnout, what's the very first step you'd

recommend they take to not be stuck in anxiety,

to really realize, OK, I need help and to reach

out to you, to us, to any coach, to a mentor,

whatever, whoever they want to call it, but not

over go it for sure. Not. Yeah. Be honest to

themselves and we all should do that just to

be honest to ourselves and seek for help. That

was really good. Thank you. Is there anything

you would like to say in closing and how can

they get in touch with you? I'm more than happy

to have a quick free 30 minutes get to know call,

you know, via my website and we can set it up

or write me an email or reach me. via LinkedIn

or Instagram. I'm happy to have a real conversation

and to support your work. And thank you so much

for giving me the opportunity and for having

me tonight. Yes, thank you. Thank you. I appreciate

it. Thank you for being on the show. Thank you,

Debbie.