Women’s Health, Boundaries, and High-Performance Habits with Dr. Amy Loden-Tiffany

Welcome to The Behavioral Profit, the show where

behavior drives performance and performance drives

profit. I'm your host, Debbie Longo, executive

behavioral coach. On this podcast, we look...

past surface -level strategies and focus on the

behaviors, decision, and internal patterns that

quietly shape leadership, business growth, and

long -term success. Because when behavior shifts,

everything else follows. Today I'm joined by

Dr. Amy Lodin -Tiffani. Amy is a physician, entrepreneur,

TEDx speaker, author, and founder of Vitality

Medical and Wellness Consulting. After years

in academic and corporate medicine, she made

a deliberate shift from traditional practice

to build work that aligns with how people actually

live and lead. She works closely with ambitious

women, followers, and CEO moms, helping them

navigate major life and leadership transitions,

particularly around women's health, metabolism,

and long -term vitality without sacrificing identity,

energy, or impact. This conversation connects

health leadership and behavior in a way that's

practical, honest, and deeply relevant. Amy,

welcome to the show, Behavioral Profit. I'm glad

you're here. Hi, Debbie. Thanks for having me.

I'm excited. Amy, you live through multiple high

-stakes transitions, personally and professionally.

When you look back, what was the first internal

shift that had happened before anything external

could change? One of the biggest things that

happens when you're in training as a physician

is that you don't realize what's out there. You

kind of are well aware of what the education

system is and the priorities that let you advance

through that system. But there's almost a us

versus them mentality that becomes inbred within

that culture of academic medicine. And for me,

that big shift was I had to realize I could be

them. I could be the outside doctor, I could

be the non -academic and still be a good doctor.

And so redefining what does it mean to be a good

doctor early on in my career was the absolute

transition shift I had to make because academic

medicine has one way they define it, but there's

others. Right. Thank you. That was good. So sometimes

I need a little bit more than the academic side,

going to school and studying and everything.

There had been people that I know that just wound

up not liking or deciding that their career was

the right career for them after they went through

some schooling or spoke to people in the field

or Whatever so that's why i think these subjects

and these topics here that are good that we're

talking about because maybe this can help somebody

if they are unsure or they're just curious about

what are all these things mean these things that

we're talking about here what do they all mean

and what are they about and maybe if the person

is a little bit. doesn't really think that they

might want to do the career, then they might

consider some of these points that we're talking

about here. Interesting. You stepped away from

traditional medicine to build something different.

What behaviors or beliefs did you have learned?

Did you unlearn to lead in a new way? One of

the things doctors are taught is to order as

few as test as possible. It will give you the

answer for the patient. They want low cost, high

impact. We want people to find value and not

run up a big bill for them. But sometimes that

means you keep looking. And sometimes it means

you have metrics that don't match the employer's

preference for what you perform at. And I ran

into this with my boss on my first job. I would

find answers for people. And he literally told

me, Amy, you find some really interesting things

and problems for people. You change their lives,

but you're finding these because you're looking

for them. And so the clash that came up to me

is I was taught not to look, not to go further,

not to do the thing to find the problem, the

solution for the patient. And that was a total

difference. that I was not willing to continue.

I had to unlearn and teach myself, my patient

is having a problem. I am not going to worry

about whether or not this runs up my metrics.

I'm going to worry about what makes this valuable

for my patient. And I'm going to keep looking

until we find an answer. And that is simply not

how doctors are taught. So that was a very uncomfortable

change in how I had to be willing to practice

my craft. And that's a change that many people

feel across industries. This is not unique to

healthcare. many executives and high performers

have to stop and think, was what I taught going

to give me the results, my company, my family,

my health, whatever needs. Interesting, because

as you can probably figure, I've had a lot of

the opposite experiences with doctors over testing.

So have I. I've had it as a patient. And I look

at my colleague like, you're not going to wear

this just because you were taught not to? That

doesn't make any sense. Let's use science. Let's

use our brains. Let's come together with a patient

and our provider hats and connect in a way that's

meaningful. Next question is, you work with women

during life transitions, like childbirth and

menopause. From a behavioral standpoint, what

do these moments reveal about how people manage

energy boundaries and decision making long term?

Women in particular have a tendency to take on

as much as they can to be everything they can

to everybody. and to not limit what that means

for their health. And when you don't, boundaries,

there's a misconception about, people think boundaries

are to keep you out, but boundaries are to keep

you safe. So if you don't have boundaries on

your time, on your priorities, on what's valuable

to you, everybody else is going to take those

from you. And whether it's the new mom who's

dealing with the baby and she wants to be the

sole caregiver, or she wants to go back to her.

versus the woman who's done the whole childcare

story and now she's in menopause, but her hot

flashes are so bad, it's causing her predictivity

to suffer at work. Either extreme, you have to

be very clear on what do I value? What's important

to me in this moment in my life? What am I trying

to make an impact on? Is it my kids, my business,

my health, whatever? And then how do I prioritize

them? You have to be super intentional in both

of those major transitions. Yes, that's important

too. I just kind of think And feel that first

of all all different doctors do different practices

even though they're basically taught one thing

we don't know what that's what we don't know

how they train we don't know so this is the thing.

My friends say that I should ask for their grade

point average. Do you believe it? This is something

that I never thought about. When they graduate

because we think that a lot of times that and

I don't want to say anything bad about doctors

or anything. That's not why doctors. I'm just

I'm with you. Well, yeah, I'm just trying to

be critical for a reason. And I'm not trying

to, like I said, talk bad about anybody. But

the point is that There are doctors that, like

I said, it doesn't really seem like they're intelligent

enough to really do the job, not only bedside

manner, that's like a completely different thing,

but just know what to say and what to do and

how to make a treatment plan, basic things. And

there's a lot of times where we find that me

and just... clients, friends, I'm just talking

about general people because everybody goes to

that. I mean, healthcare is a huge, huge industry.

It's probably like the biggest industry. I am

speaking from lived experience of someone who

lives with a chronic illness. I am speaking with

lived experience of a husband who's faced cancer

twice, of children that I've had to take to the

emergency room and argue with the ER in the middle

of the night that they needed to be seen. So

I have a ton of empathy. for the people. What

I think is missing in healthcare is not just

trust, but also feeling heard. I don't think

patients feel heard by their healthcare teams,

whether it's the doctor or all the way down.

I also think that Dr. Chat GPT and Dr. Google

make it a little confusing because what happens,

and this is not in my practice. I'm going to

speak from the perspective of when I had my prior

practice, I had 3000 patients and that's pretty

common for a primary care doctor. And I had about

10 minutes with each patient. And this was not

the patient coming in and saying, I have the

stentles. It was them coming in and saying, how

do I treat my diabetes? How do I lose weight?

What do I do for my cholesterol, my high blood

pressure? Oh, by the way, I need this signed.

And my bones are maybe getting weak. When can

I get my mammogram? Those that I just listed

are seven different things. Now, in 10 minutes,

getting that done well is a joke. So I want to

go back to your original question about the grade

point average. I did graduate at the top of my

class. So. If somebody asked me that, I wouldn't

care. But I can tell you the people who I would

guess didn't graduate at the top of the class

sometimes have better Google reviews because

they're not so rigid in their thinking of, I

know all the perfect answers to the perfect test,

and everything's check, check, check, check.

I think there's a lot of room for improvement.

Do not hear what I'm not saying. I've had a lot

of doctors. I have doctors now that are like,

oh, I wish I could fire this doctor. They are

not listening to me. And these are my colleagues,

my peers. But it is the reality that I have to

live with because I can't get anywhere else.

Whether it's for insurance or geographical location,

other limitations, this is it. And learning how

to advocate for yourself in the shortest time

possible. So what I would often do when I had

3 ,000 patients is I would often say, look, I

have a list. Tell me what your list is. We may

not get through it all. Let's find out what the

top one or two things are. And maybe they align

with my list. Maybe they don't. But I would have

people come in more frequently so that they knew

me. They could trust me. Even if I ordered a

test that said, no, you don't have this problem,

doesn't mean I negate their symptoms. And that

is, I think, one of the biggest things doctors

are not taught. It's very common. You may be

familiar, your listeners, with something called

the ANA test. It's a screening test for autoimmune

diseases. And one in four people have a positive

test. Having a positive test does not mean you

have an autoimmune disease, but it means we need

to consider that. Having a negative test is very

good for understanding that it's probably not

there. Let's say it's negative. And maybe it's

positive before it bounces around a lot. It's

negative. And you say, listen, I feel awful.

I'm tired all the time. I can't get out of bed

because the pain is so bad. All these medicine

side effects are building up. I'm gaining weight.

And you can tell me all the things. At the end

of the day, do you really care if I call it an

autoimmune disease or if I tell you I hear your

symptoms and let's find a way to make them better?

And maybe that's not with medicine. Maybe it

is. I think people want to be heard. I think

they want to be respected. I think they want

to be seen as the expert in their body. because

they live in it. And just because I can't provide

a test that gives us a conclusive answer doesn't

mean their symptom isn't real or valid. And that

is what I don't see taught well in medical school.

I trained at Cornell, one of the best institutions

in the world. And this is not something they

taught us. This is my lived experience and learning.

So if we can teach all the doctors that across

all countries, I think that will elevate medicine,

even if we don't do anything different on our

testing because people want to be valued and

heard. They want to know that their story is

listened to, that they are valued, that they

have meaning, and they want to be included. Yeah,

very good points. The next question is, many

high -performing women push through exhaustion

because it's been normalized. How do you help

leaders recognize when powering through is working

against their performance and profitability?

So one of the things that most leaders understand

across industries is results matter. We're judged

on our metrics, our results, and our outcomes.

So when somebody is pushing through, particularly

my women who are often working two jobs, the

one that they get paid for and the one at home,

they're often doing caregiving for their elderly

parents and other individuals or their young

children. And so one of the things I often will

ask them is let's set up silos. Let's have our

family, let's have our health, our financial,

our spiritual, our physical. And let's just say

one to 10, how are we doing? And if everything's

eight or above, great. most of the time. I can't

actually think of the last 10 or 10 or above

actually and all of those. And if you can understand

for yourself where you're ranking yourself in

these silos, then we can really get to work.

And we can start to say, is this giving you the

metrics you want? Is this giving you the outcomes

you want? Is pushing yourself for everybody else

or for your business helping you? Or is it just

kicking a can of further down the road until

Literally, you can't go any further and you've

worked yourself into a hospital. And I've actually

worked myself into that hospital bed. So I speak

from that lived experience of you can absolutely

burn out. You can have moral injury. You can

have wherever you want to call the spectrum.

What's interesting to me is the drivers of that

are the same drivers of the chronic diseases

we talk about. It's the lack of high quality

sleep, the nutrition that works for our body,

the adequate hydration, the stress relief, and

not having the toxicities, right? Whether it's

physical, environmental, emotional, relational

toxicities. It's not being who we were created

to be at our highest value. And part of that's

because the system, there's so many systems that

are set up to screw us over on this. Part of

it's cultural. Women do tend to do this more

than men. And part of it is, the flat answer

is we let them. We let everything do this. And

that's hard truth to hear. But until you can

own that I'm letting all these things in, you

can't change anything. And you're not going to

change anything overnight. This doesn't happen

overnight. It's going to take weeks, months,

probably years to get different. But 1 % better

each day is a massive difference in the year.

So I like your answer. I thought it was very

good. But I think that a lot of times if, like,

did you ever hear of everyone must hit bottom?

So a lot of times if we get a counselor or a

coach or something, we don't get to this point.

So if I am pregnant or I work two jobs, the situation

is where I'm overloaded. The first thing I want

to do is recognize that way before it gets to

the point where I'm exhausted and I don't know

my energies or boundaries. And then I will be

level -headed enough to know what to do and what

not to do. So eating right, because this fuels

our brain, even changing our behavior, a breathing

exercise. I mean, there's tons of things that

we could do that takes two seconds. These are

not really time. You want something time consuming.

I can give you a meditation for 45 minutes. But

there are things that take two seconds to do.

But I need to train my brain not to do these

things. It's interesting because the simple things

to do. are also the simple things not to do.

And what many women, at least in my clientele,

what I find is that they often go, go, go, and

give, give, give, and have been taught by the

high performing women in their lives, whether

it's their families, their cultures, their religions,

their works. Like all of it is just keep going,

keep giving. And at a fundamental level, we all

realize if you drain the battery, it's not going

to work anymore. And most women will actually

tell me, I know I need to exercise. I know I

need to get in sleep. I know I need to... It's

not a lack of knowledge. It's a lack of execution.

You don't know how to do it because no one teaches

them. And doctors certainly aren't taught how

to teach patients this. Neither are nurses or

physician associates. Like, this is a fundamental

problem. We are not proactive. We're not intentional.

And how can we fault people for doing that when

we haven't taught them how to do it? Eventually,

that's why I left the practices I was in. This

is not working. This is mediocre medicine of

vast. I can put out a lot of fires, but let's

prevent them. Let's build systems. And you'll

know if you have systems that aren't working

in your life because you'll have results you

don't want. It'll be the weight gain, the brain

fog, the fatigue, the body aches, the constant

exhaustion. Those are the things that I hear

every single day. And those are the things I've

experienced myself. It is not for lack of trying

that most people find themselves where they are.

They know some things, but they want it to be

different and they can't get there. I would be

expecting to do it alone. Yeah, so these are

very good points that you're making and you made

a good description of a transition that you just

spoke about not being in the field anymore and

doing what you feel that your calling is and

your own way or a way that you were taught or

a combination of helping people. When doing what

you feel and that's another reason why i have

these types of podcasts because like i said maybe

somebody's interested maybe somebody's curious

but either way whether i'm happy or not there's

a positive way to get through anything that i

am going through in my life whether it's very

small or very big but there's a positive way

but if i'm already doing positive things then

i don't need that. But if I'm doing negative

things and all of these things that we're talking

about to me is all negativity and these will

hurt me and not help me in my life that I'm in

and in my future life. So this is the thing.

And I think about, do I want to have goals and

what are they? And do I want to stay in this

state of mind? Exhaustion, high energy. low energy,

boundaries, powering through. All these things

to me are all things that I can improve in my

life. And when I do that, but do I want to do

it? Do I want to do it? Do I want to stay in

sick and suffering? Do I want to continue to

do these things? That's not my choice. I don't

do them. That's all I know. You know, what you're

saying is so fascinating to me because praying

at a fundamental level. is always going to be

prioritizing pleasure. It's always going to seek

safety. It's always going to prioritize pleasure.

So if my pleasure at the end of the day comes

home, got the five kids in bed, done my notes,

and I just want to sit and watch Netflix for

two hours versus watching Netflix while I walk

on my treadmill for 30 minutes, my brain is looking

at which one is more easy, which one gives me

better pleasure faster. And it's always going

to prioritize that. And so what I look at when

people aren't doing the things that they say

they know they should do, or that they say they

want to do, I actually tell them, can we be really

honest for a second? Can we just really acknowledge

that your brain actually doesn't want to do it

right now? And that's why you're not doing it.

And stop saying, I should do this, I should do

that. Just stop shoulding and focus on what do

you want? What's your outcome? And I think if

you do that at a global level, you can make your

yearly plan, your monthly, your weekly, whatever.

But a lot of times you have to come up with a

routine. You have to have a system in place.

And the system might be that, yes, I'm going

to walk 30 minutes while I do my Netflix binge,

and then maybe I'm going to watch another Netflix

binge later. But I get to choose. I get to make

that choice. And if I can empower, if people

don't hear anything else I say today, I want

them to hear that you get to choose. Your brain's

always going to go for what feels good. But do

you want to play the short game or the long game?

And most people have not been taught to play

the long game, particularly in terms of their

habit and their health. Yeah, so just one last

thing. I like what you said. When I go through

this process, a lot of times I learn how to control

my mind instead of my mind controlling me. And

I don't want to be what's comfortable. It's to

do the opposite. That's not the point and that's

and that's why I need all of this coaching stuff

I know people that have been through this and

have caught themselves Before they got up to

this point and their life is a thousand times

better Than it used to be and I might need somebody

to help me make that decision Before I get to

this point and that's really the bottom line

who I choose To help me. That's my choice. I

can give more than one suggestion. I'm not trying

to sell myself here. I'm a coach. I've done this

a hundred times. I know exactly what to do. I

can give you a million examples and descriptions

and you know, everything, but that's up to the

individual how they want to help themselves if

they want to at all. That's what I'm saying.

All these things are so important to talk about.

And these are ways that you got through it, but

also We're focusing on specific things, which

I like because these questions are about so somebody

could focus on something specific here and that

will help them hopefully to identify a little

better rather than everything being so general,

just general questions where we're not covering

every single thing. But if we focus on specific

things, then sometimes it works out better because

that person is just. Focused on that one thing

a lot of times They don't have like like a broad

range of thinking or they're stuck in them inside

themselves Where they want to repeat that same

behavior over and over they want to repeat that

same negativity over and over Why because it

makes them feel comfortable because they don't

want to change because they're too lazy Because

they might want to binge watch on TV rather than

do something else create denial I can give you

a million examples of this. And that's why a

lot, and I've done a few of these like this now.

My past few ones were similar to this, all different

industries and stuff. And that's why these things

to me are so important. Absolutely. One of the

things that's fascinating, and you can just go

Google this information. You can Google, what

has my wife's been? We actually, this is part

of the annual evaluation we do at our clinic,

but what we figure out is what is a person's

projected lifestyle, not based on their medical

conditions, not based on their medications, but

based on their habits. And when you look at somebody's

habits, it can be the difference in a lifespan

of 20 years. Habits only. How much sleep do I

get? Do I wear my seatbelt? Am I over desiring

all the things and am I acting on that desire

or not? 20 years is a pretty impressive difference

based only on my choices and my habits. Yes,

agreed. Thank you. Last question is, if someone

listening is in the middle of a transition, career,

health, identity, what is one behavioral adjustment

that creates the biggest return over time? Yeah.

As I thought about this question a little bit,

because I see this in my patients nearly every

week, I actually said there's three things and

you choose one of them. The first thing is, are

you really getting quality sleep? So go down

the sleep pathway and figure out are you getting

quality sleep? Is it, are you waking up tired?

Are you waking up with headaches or do you feel

refreshed when you go? So that would be option

one. Option two would be get strength training.

Most adults are not getting two hours a week

and that is absolutely critical for long -term

independence and high functioning after retirement.

And number three is probably the one that I find

easiest for my CEO moms to deal with and for

my women in transition is pick two meals a day,

I don't care which two they are, and after them

go for a 10 minute brisk walk. It can be in your

office, it can be outside, it does not have to

be at the gym, it can be walking in place, I

don't really care. 10 minutes after you eat twice

a day, that is probably the most effective, free,

high impact choice that people can implement

immediately, that gives them so much value when

it comes to their health, and then in turn impacts

sleep and energy and the things that they want

to do. Those are very, very good suggestions.

I live in Florida and I live right by the beach.

So I'm at the beach all the time and I walk on

the beach and I just spend time looking at the

water and. watching the waves and stuff and i

have friends that live literally right on the

beach and they walk on the beach every single

day but when i didn't live by the beach and i

lived in new york i walked on a in a park and

to me this is just me the way my personality

is i like to walk with his water because when

i have the water i get the cheese. When I get

the Chi I give the negative energy back and I

get the Chi back, you know So this is the way

for me that it works when I'm around water and

that way I get everything just gets released

Right away a lot quicker. I think if somebody

lives in a remote location or rural area They're

probably around water. Yeah, so at least outside

of nature Exactly or nature a park or something

To be fair, there are places even like I'm in

St. Louis and there's places here I wouldn't

walk in broad daylight. So that's why I think

it's important. And I agree with you, we have

health coaches on our team for this very reason

is each person's plan needs to be designed according

to their life and they are the expert in their

life. So if I have a business woman tell me,

I can't walk inside, outside, upside down, doesn't

matter. Okay, then why are we talking about walking?

Let's do something else. Let's design it for

your life in a way that you can implement and

execute them. Yeah, that was very good. Thank

you. Is there something that you would like to

say in closing? Well, what I would just offer,

if your listeners found any of this helpful,

is they're welcome to contact my office for a

free copy of my book, The Postpartum Pivot. It

was designed to help any woman who's had a baby,

adopted a baby, fostered a baby, doesn't matter.

But that child has changed their rhythms. And

as that child grows, and now they're a teenager,

those rhythms continue to change. And now mom's

in menopause and the The college student is constantly

at home. That change is never going away. We

think of postpartum as a year -long process,

and it's for the rest of your life. So then how

do you make these habits happen in the context

of everything you're dealing with? And they're

welcome to contact my office. We ask they pay

shipping and handling, but we'll send them a

book for free. They'd like to do that. Thank

you very much. Amy, this has been an important

conversation. You've connected health, leadership,

and behavior in a way that's grounded and realistic,

especially for people carrying a lot of responsibility.

Before we wrap up, where can listeners find more

and learn about your work? They can follow us

on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube, at Dr. Amy

Tiffany. You can also find me on LinkedIn or

on Facebook. You can go to our website vitalitymwc

.org and schedule a free consultation and we'll

get them headed in the next direction as best

for them. And I will put all of this in the description

on every platform that's probably imaginable.

Thank you for listening to the behavioral profit

if today's conversation resonated with you It's

likely because it touched a behavioral pattern

that matters awareness is the first step but

action is what creates change you can find more

episodes resources and Ways to work with me at

life in bloom and why net until next time pay

attention to the behaviors Driving your decisions

because that's where real profit begins. Amy.

Thank you very much for being on the show Thank

you.