Steve Barton: Therapy, Forgiveness, Spiritual Awakening, and Finding Purpose Through Intuition

Welcome to the Internal Shift Show. I'm Debbie

Longo, transformational coach. This show explores

how the way we think, decide, and respond internally

influences where we end up over time. Today's

conversation draws on real experience and expertise

to look at how small internal shifts can change

direction, momentum, and outcomes. I'm joined

today by a very special guest, Steve Barton.

Good afternoon, Steve, welcome to the show. Hi,

Debbie, and thank you so much for allowing me

to be on your show, and I hope to share some...

Useful information for you and your audience

and I'm looking forward to being interviewed.

Perfect. Thank you. Thank you for being here.

I'm gonna ask you to tell your story and point

out a part or situation or scenario or life change

in your story where you went through a process

and the end result should always be positive.

Now, I do this show for a few different reasons.

And one main reason is because everybody has

their own individual story. But there are parts

to people's stories that other people can relate

to. So maybe somebody is in a negative situation

and they don't know how to get out of it. Or

maybe they're in a scenario or maybe an abusive.

situation or relationship or something like that

and they just think that it's normal they just

think this is the way that it's gonna be okay

for the rest of my life and there's no way that

i'm gonna get out of this now i don't believe

there's any such thing as any negative situation

or scenario or anything because anything that's

negative can always be changed into a positive

so basically what we're trying to show here is

that this basically a light at the end of the

tunnel. So anything anybody can get through anything,

provided that they're willing and able to do

it. If they want to do it, they're going to say,

I don't want to be this way anymore. My life

can be better than what it is. Those are some

of the reasons why I do this show. So we'll talk

about it a little bit more about it, too. So

if you could do that for me, I would appreciate

it. Thank you. Hi, I'm Steve Barton. And my story

is a bit strange. Even to this day, I look back

and and think how a lot of Strange things turn

out to be quite good and to not judge what's

happening, but to kind of go with it So it was

33 years ago that I was 36 years old My first

wife was with her. She was a VP of LL Bean in

Maine, and I'm in Portland, Maine and All the

C -suite executives were going to therapy 33

years ago You didn't go to therapy and tell anybody

and it was kind of a taboo that you went because

there was something wrong with you It seemed

like everything was happening, and I just knew

that something was off. So I booked a call with

the therapist. His name was Larry. I'll call

him Larry, because that's his name. Kind of a

Dr. Rogers type, older gentleman, probably in

his 70s at the time. So I go, and I had the session,

and he says, why are you here? I said, I have

everything in the world that I want, and I'm

not happy. And I said, that's f -ed up. And he

said, I go, how long is it gonna take, and what

can I expect? And what he said to me was, well,

usually I say three months, but you're halfway

there. And then he goes, what you can expect

is mental health. And I didn't know what mental

health was. So I said, okay, I'm just gonna go

with this. And in the meantime, I was reading

A Course in Miracles, Elizabeth Kubler -Roth,

Death and Dying, and Stephen Covey, Seven Habits

of Highly Effective People. I didn't know what

I was setting myself up for. and I didn't know

what was gonna happen, but I just had this draw

in me that I've got to figure this out. I knew

I had to forgive, of course in miracles, all

about that, and I knew that basically that means

let go. Within 10 minutes I'm saying everything

I could possibly think of that could ever have

been disappointing or traumatizing to me. So

it felt like I was building up this pile of stuff

in the middle of his floor, and I said, boy,

that feels really good, and I'm gonna keep it

here. And he goes, I don't want it. And I said,

not my problem. I said, do you have homework

when you go to therapy? What do you do? He goes,

you know what you need to do. That was my first

adventure on the treasure hunt, figuring out

what I needed to do. I was going every two weeks,

and I... My plan was to go two weeks, and so

my homework assignment was figure out what I

needed to do. And what I needed to do was forgive

my father. And I had my first and only one -on

-one father -son conversation with my dad. The

first and only. And it was really good. It took

me an hour and a half to get him to talk to me.

But when we did, I told him everything I knew

about family secrets and... and betrayals and

everything. And I said, I loved you, loved him.

And I left that meeting on a high that in the

eighties, I had done Coke and I liked it and

I stopped it quickly because I liked it, but

it felt like that and it was natural. And I'm

thinking, wow, this is amazing. So I go to a

couple of days later, I'm going to the. my second

session. And I said to Larry, I said, Larry,

I'm on a cocaine high and it's natural. Has this

happened to all your patients? He looked at me

like, no. Well, I kind of like it. And it's natural

and it's legal and I can do it myself. So he

asked me what I'd done. I told him what I'd done.

And the hour went by quickly and I said, is there

another homework assignment? And he said, said

it stood at the door and said, read the redemption.

And the only redemption I've ever heard of in

Portland, Maine is there's a bottle center. You

bring down your empties and they give you five

and ten cents for the redemption. So lived in

this old house I bought, and there was a family

Bible. It sounded biblical, so I'm going on that.

It sounded religious. It sounded biblical. So

that was my clue. Huge family Bible that came

with the house. Nothing there was no glossary

so I couldn't couldn't find it but I had been

reading a course in miracles and and I looked

in there was a glossary so I skimmed down it

and Mid 200 pages there was the the egos final

Awareness or something like that the the fear

of redemption. I said bingo. So I'm sitting in

my living room and reading this passage and it

was very calming and very just reading it's when

you figure out that you never left and I look

up from reading halfway down the page and I was

connected at my left ankle and I was stepping

out and I didn't know what and in that time time

stopped and I knew I had a choice to either go

or stay and I had a vision that they'd find my

parents and wife would find me on the couch dead

quote -unquote and Oh, he's under a lot of stress

at work, and this family business I ran. And

he's under this, they were talking and they were

making, he must have died of a heart attack.

And I had that vision of going, no. And I took

the, I was finally happy. And what I didn't say

before was when I left, I had ideas of, I want

to get a heroin high without heroin. And that's,

I wanted to get high. And that's when he said,

read the redemption. I threw the book down. I

said the F word about 30 times, because I had

no clue what I was involved in, and I figured

that God would not take me if I said the F word

ad nauseam. And it worked, apparently. So I don't

recommend that to anyone, but I had nothing to

go on, nothing to work with, and I threw the

book, said the words, and it's back in my body,

like you see on TV, if you're gonna see. things

like Ghost and Whoopi Goldbergs, things like

that. It's somewhat true. And so my mind is humming.

I had this fine, it's the ohm, it's the cosmic

ohm. I was connected. And it was like, oh my

God. And I had no way to turn, no one to talk

to. I didn't know if I could share this with

the therapist thinking they'd commit me, thinking

that who's gonna believe this? So. I'm back and

I am on a high that I had never felt in my entire

life. And what I'm realizing, too, you reach,

you get connected and you become extremely intuitive

because we are connected to that universal source

energy. And did you just one quick question?

Did you actually die and come back to life? I

don't want to interrupt you. I stayed connected

at the ankle. So but it was a time stood still.

I knew that I had a choice. Take off or stay.

and I was having such a good time on my cocaine

high. It was fine. Yeah, it was good feeling.

It was a feel good. I'm gonna stick around here

for a long time. So I go to my therapy session,

and about three, another three days later, and

I said, Larry, I'm so high, I can't come down,

and it's all natural. And the fact is, I don't

wanna come down. A, I don't know how to. B, I

don't want to. And, but I do have to integrate.

And I think. that what I had to do was shut my

mouth to my family, integrate it, find my tribe

of people who've had these experiences. The people

I used to think are weird are now my weirdo friends.

Find these people and really get a group of people

who I can talk to and integrate a natural state

of awareness to living in a normal everyday.

work environment and who to share the stuff with

and who not to share this. So I'm doing this

podcast to help people who do have an awakening.

You can call it a spiritual awakening. You can

call it whatever you want. It is powerful. It

changed my life 180 degrees and I had to learn

who I could share it with, who I'm not able to

share it to. And to say it in a way that is grounded

and that is not hyper hypomanic or that because

It appears to be that way. We knew that if you're

not grounded with it. So it's really about being

grounded and awake and aware. Yeah. So thank

you for that. And thank you for your honesty

and your openness. So this is actually very common.

And there's tons of research, tons of examples.

I mean, you can you can look it up. Tons of people

have this. all different types of experiences

like this. I know two or three people that have

had it. My spiritual teacher died like three

times, flat -lined, when then she came back to

life. And then each time, she was a practicing

psychic and channeler and everything, right?

From the very beginning. And every time that

happened, she just got, her abilities just got

stronger and stronger. And this is the reason,

a lot of times, it's not always the reason, but

this is a big... reason why this happens to people

is so they could become more intuitive whereas

this is their path for whatever is going to happen

or whatever path they're supposed to go on and

who they're supposed to help whatever the situation

is and sometimes people need that that jolt you

know or or whatever it's just not really something

that can really be explained but Nine times out

of ten, it's done so you could come out of it

a different person. So now you could move on

to the next chapter or whatever in your life

because you wouldn't be this way if you didn't

have that near -death experience, outer body

experience, you know, change, whatever you want

to call it. There's a hundred different ways

that people do this. when there's a hundred different

examples. But I mean, there's television shows

about it. There's specials about it. There's

all kinds of like I said, I know a few people

personally. I haven't done it. I'm just naturally

intuitive. And I just walk and walk around and

talk to everybody and kind of like do it. It

just comes natural for me, basically. It is a

natural thing. I forget to mention that. I told

Larry, when I went back for my third time, I

said, Larry, I don't know whether to thank you

or to be mad at you. He goes, why? What's going

on? I said, I read the redemption and had an

out -of -body experience. I am on a high that

I can't condone. And he goes, his response was,

and in the meantime, I was channeling, I was.

people coming in our flower shop with their relatives

who had deceased. It was validated. So I was

having all that. And my biggest mistake, I have

no regrets now, but during that time, I told

my wife, I told my siblings, I told my family,

they thought I was nuts. So I'm interested, the

funny part was Larry says, I never told you to

read the redemption. And I said, you know what,

Larry? I said, with the stuff I've gone through

in the past couple weeks, I said, I believe you

and I believe that you channeled and it was supposed

to come out email and I can't any other way.

It's just the way that it's supposed to be for

you. It's not something that can be rationalized

or explained or thought through. It's not like

a thinking process. It's just something that

happens to somebody and that's the path that

they're supposed to go on. And that gift or whatever

they get from that That thing that happened is

going to help them with whatever that path is

that they're going to be going on after they

come out of this experience. And that's and like

I said, there's I mean, this shows about I mean,

there's tons of there's 100 different examples

and stuff. Like I was talking about my spiritual

teacher and she was the one that helped me to

do this work and to be a coach and everything.

And that was she doesn't I don't do what she

does. I kind of do. i don't do it like to the

extent that she does i have some back and work

that i do that. I don't really like reveal like

in detail, but that doesn't really have anything

directly to do with anybody. So there's really

no reason for it to be said. But the point that

we're trying to make here to this whole thing

is not, I don't want to focus on this too much,

but this one particular thing. But the point

that we're trying to make here is that you had

this thing happen to you, right? Where you went

to see a therapist, you needed to make amends

to your father, a few different things that happened.

The question is, the big question is, what was

your process? We know about the experience that

you had, but what was your process when you went

to the therapist and you found out that you needed

to do this? What was your thinking about? How

were you upset? Were you mad that you needed

to do this? And how were you going to do this?

Because you didn't know that this was going to

happen. It just happened. So what was your process

and what was your thinking about that? Yeah,

I mean, I had no clue. I was I was doing uncharted

territories for anything I'd ever read about

or heard about. The only out of body experience

I remember was the movie Ghost seeing Patrick

Swayze on the table leaving. It was just like

that. I can only describe it. And it was really

amazing what it was, because I was opaque with

my jeans on and shirt on, but in light form.

And I didn't know what to make. I had no words

for it. Do I be mad at you for telling me? Did

you know about this? I don't think he knew about

it. And I know he didn't because he said to me,

Do you have some good people around you? And

in the meantime, you've heard the phrase, when

the student's ready, the teacher appears, I had

three people around me who randomly picked me

out, picked me out, told me about their stories

randomly. I had my tribe with me to guide me

through. One was a personal development teacher

who had a yes course and got me to, I finished

my career at 58 at the flower shop and do my

own coaching now. And do I have time for another

story that happened about a month ago? Yes, you

do. So what I've learned is in how this has worked

for me and have allowed it to work for me and

to integrate it, I do know that we are intentional,

intuitive, being energetic or spiritual beings

having a physical experience. And once we're

aligned with that, it really is an asset. And

I use it as an asset to to connect with people.

On a level of awareness that is intuitive and

like Debbie, I can talk to anybody. My girlfriend

says, I can talk to a stick for an hour. Is it

probably right? So about a month ago, I, in my

business group, a woman, I'm in a BNI group and

a woman came down two hours north of Portland

and Mangor to do a talk. And she was a coach

and a leadership coach and life coach. And she

did a great talk. After the meeting, I went up

to her and said, I really like what you had to

say. And she liked what I had to say in my one

minute talk. I said, let's do a one -to -one.

So two weeks later we have a one -to -one and

we're talking. She's starting her, she's about

a year and a half into her business. And in that

half hour we talked, she told me she used to

work for Jay Shetty and who's quite famous in

the personal development and coaching field.

He coaches coaches with his process and half

hour. And she goes, so what else you got Steve?

I said, well, I I channel dead people. She goes,

that's cool. I said, I love that, because usually

if someone goes, oh, that's weird or something,

I'll go, what about those red socks? What about,

I'll change the subject real quick. So she was,

do you want to do it? She goes, yeah. I said,

and basically I didn't go, I'm pretty normal.

I think I'm normal, but obviously I'm not, I'm

natural. And into some people that's weird and

that's okay. So I... get her, she told me I can

tell the story and tell her name. So it's Karen

and French Canadian background is a lot of people

in Maine are. And so, but I didn't put that together

until I get, do you get a Pepe? And she says,

yep. I said, Oh, Pepe is coming through. And

Pepe wants to talk. I said, did he have a, I'm

seeing a lake. I'm seeing, I saw the ripples.

It wasn't the ocean. It was a lake or a pond,

but I said, did you have a lake house? He goes,

yeah. And I said, I'm seeing two girls in a yellow.

Cool town canoe. Yup, me and my sister. I said,

okay. Pepe wants to talk about fishing. Yeah,

but we didn't, she goes, we didn't go fishing

out of the canoe. I said, no, we had a power

boat. I see the power boat. And he wants to talk

about fishing. Does this resonate with you? She

goes, oh yeah. And how it resonated with her

was three days before we had our one -to -one,

she talked to her best friend and says, I want

to get a sign from Pepe that I did the right

thing after my 20 year career with Jay. I want

to know that I made the right choice and I want

to have a sign and I want it to come from Pepe.

And I've really made it specific and I want him

to talk about fishing. So not only did you get

to know me like me and trust me in that half

hour, we now do bi -weekly, every other week

we do a coaching accountability partner. What

we're doing how we're growing what new ideas

we're doing so I've got a great friend so I think

that that's why I promote intuition and Intentionality

like coaching so we know your coaching is more

of like an intuitive channeling Reading kind

of thing basically my first just incorporate

it into that. It's not my it's probably 10 %

of what I do if someone's Most people just wanna

be happy and not to be stressed at work and stuff

like that. That's 80 % of what I do. And then

if they get to, I call it 10, that's infinite,

what do you wanna do? My first client was the

executive director for the Gestalt International

Study Center. Four days into the thing, I'm channeling

her husband who was deceased two and a half years

prior. My first executive coach, she told me

I can tell the story. She was the executive director

of the Gestalt International Study Center in

Boston. And part of that, she had a 30 year career

as the head of HR for AT &T World. So she negotiated

high powerful contracts, just one of my dearest

friends today. And it's, so I think intuition,

I love my intuition. I'm more ashamed of it,

you know, cleared with everybody because some

people take it in a way that it's not accurate.

Right. So, how do you feel today, right this

second, right now, based on this whole podcast,

everything that we just talked about, how do

you feel? Rounded, happy, content, listened,

heard, and hopefully helping others who go through

it and know that it's natural. And our society

really doesn't support it. I mean, 33 years later,

it's better now, but I don't think people are

really supported. Or really, if you haven't...

Experienced it yourself. How do you understand

it? Yeah, and that was very good. Thank you And

that's a very good way to close and then in closing

I would like to say that this might be your experience

It might not be maybe you got the listener got

something out of this You might not have to have

this exact experience Maybe you got something

out of you know, anything that we said a little

part of it or something but nothing can be a

negative. Anything that's negative can always

be turned into a positive. Regarding that we

have to create the willingness in order to do

it and say, put my foot down. and say this happened

in the past and that's gone i'm gonna change

right the second i could do something right the

second to make my life better because i don't

want to live this way anymore and you are an

example of that what happened to you was just

a natural thing that happened. But that is to

me is really a gift because that allowed you

in a very easy way to change into the person

that you are now. That's the thing. And I have

other podcasts, too. I have other shows. I mean,

I have other episodes on here. You know, so I

mean, the listener really has a variety because

I have all different stories, all different people

telling all different stories. So the listener

really has a variety of things to talk about.

And this is exactly what I'm trying. to accomplish

on this show. I'm trying to help people, to show

people that there is no such thing as a negative,

that anybody can get out of any situation that

they're in and they can make their lives 1 ,000

% better. And that's definitely not an exaggeration.

I think if they know somebody who's having a

awakening to support them and to don't think

that they're crazy, that they are going through

something that's not understood, so do the research

on awakenings, spiritual awakenings, awakenings,

out of body experiences, know that they are a

real thing. And so believe the people if they

are actually telling the truth and get them some

help with a great spiritual teacher, some or

a therapist who understands this. Perfect. Yeah.

Thank you. I appreciate that. As we close this

conversation, as a reminder, that progress rarely

comes from one big decision, but from the internal

choices we repeat. If something from today's

discussion connected with you, take a moment

to notice how those internal choices showed up

in your own life. This has been the Internal

Shift Show. Thank you for listening, and thank

you, Steve, for being on the show. I really appreciate

it. Thank you, Debbie. It was fun, and hopefully

your audience got some piece of information from

this. Thank you. Thank you.